Unless it is found on an ultrasound. Then it looks awesome!!!
We found ONE strong heartbeat and I suppose it is official: I am pregnant. Half of me is flying over the moon right now. I am so excited. It is real. My friends all say I am glowing - and I feel it. I feel pretty good overall and mentally I am much less scared that anything will happen to this pregnancy (other than birth at the end). I saw my little baby today. Amazing!
The other half of me? So embarrassed to say that she is disappointed not to be having twins. I mean, my family really doesn't need twins. We can barely afford the ones we have already, etc. etc. Maybe it is that having one baby after having twins is "less"? Maybe it is part fear of something new? OMIGOD - I am going to be able to get some sleep the first few months. (Not a lot, but some!) But my little baby isn't going to have a twin. Isn't going to have an automatic best buddy. My little baby is going to be a singleton. Is it wrong that it makes me kinda sad?
So I figure these feelings might stick around for a day or so. I have no doubt that I will get over them eventually. But I have to say I am a little torn and while I wish I were having a totally exuberant day, I guess I just have to realize that quite a bit about pregnancy, birth and motherhood may surprise me. And I am just going to have to roll with it, 'cuz that's the type of gal I am (or at least the type I want to be).
Congratulations!
ReplyDeleteI'm sure it feels weird to have 'just' one when you got used to seeing two on your wife's ultrasounds. Similarly, I strongly preferred a singleton because I was used to seeing one giant baby on my partner's ultrasounds.
I only have singletons, six years apart, but I suspect you're right that it will be easier and you'll get a lot more sleep. If your partner is willing to tag-team nights, you might get full nights of sleep within a few weeks. Dare to dream. Literally!