I don't know why this didn't post yesterday...
I am back at work and life has somewhat smoothly returned to "normal." As yet I feel this overwhelming sense of community, of family, care and concern. I am so thankful for friends who helped look after Kids and sent me nice messages. For doctors who saw me, squeezed me in, gave me the information I needed and took care of me. For Acupuncturist who looked after my entire body and spirit and family. For Wife, who has done so much to make it easier for me to relax and rest, and really been there for me. For Kids who have been really understanding of what I could and couldn't do. For my parents and sister, who surprised me by checking in on me and caring so much. And even people at work...I just feel looked after. Wish I didn't need it, but the truth is I do. And there is no shame in that.
So third opinion yesterday, at out new OB, went great. I really like her, so no more Midwife. (I have to call and cancel those appointments!) She explained...it is a subchorionic hemorrhage, which in the first trimester might mean a 50-50 chance of miscarriage. But in the second trimester, with bleeding already stopped, is closer to a 5%-10% chance. Baby still sounds strong. I am at higher risk for pre-term labor, but overall not much else should change. I can still go out of town in 2 weeks. I should avoid sex/orgasms and limit strenuous activity. No treadmill for at least a week. No additional appointments or monitoring needed at this time. All good news and I am soaking it in.
Meanwhile I had a great conversation with Acupuncturist this morning about what possessive pronoun to use with Baby...my baby? our baby? the baby? Especially when talking with Kids, I am aware of what I say. I don't want this to be MY baby, as if they weren't my babies because they were in Wife's tummy. But on a certain level, I need to take ownership or responsibility for this baby on a level that is different from everyone else who is helping me. Our baby is living and growing inside me, not us. It seems weird to be dissecting this so much, but it is something that has been worrying me for quite a while. (Yes, I know, overly analytical...) Anyway, I discovered the foundation: MY pregnancy, OUR baby. And I am starting to feel the honor of being blessed to carry OUR baby, to grow OUR baby though MY pregnancy.
