Rant about Wife

So I have been having serious doubts about the value of pumping all day in order to give Baby breast milk. My supply is not tiny, but it isn't enough to feed him entirely. So each pump feels like a disappointment - I work very hard and know that he will want 3 ounces at the next feed. I pump and hand express and take my drugs and herbs to get out a mere 2 ounces. So (at least) 8 times a day, I feel like I am failing.
And I am so tired. Like any parent with a newborn, I could really use some more sleep. Sure, I am not nearly as tired as I was with the newborn twins, but I am really, really tired. That whole "sleep when the baby sleeps" thing doesn't work when you need to pump - not to mention eating and personal hygiene and any little time spent with the older kids (sometimes out of necessity and sometimes for enjoyment). I think about all the hours I would get back if I stopped pumping.
I just don't know what to do with these thoughts. I tried to talk with Wife about them. And that was not a good idea - she just does not have the capacity to talk things out and consider things from my point of view. When I said I just don't know that it is worth it...she got all defensive and mad. Went on and on about how much harder it was for her with the older kids. How she didn't think Baby was getting shafted (and who said anything about that?). So I asked her why she was getting defensive - what had I said that upset her? She said that I had asked for her opinion, but when she gives it, I don't want it. I replied that I was just talking, and that I hadn't asked her to fix anything or even give her opinion, just that she listen to mine and my feelings and be there for me. She said that is all she has been doing for the last 3 weeks: listening. Which explains why I have been getting the silent treatment. She equates listening with not saying anything. How do I get her to understand that listening involves talking, asking questions, showing care by communicating - listening is not a silent action.
Well, I know I am still hormonal, but I think she stinks. I am so DONE trying to get through to her. I am ready to sleep in the office. I am ready to give up on trying to connect with her. I already felt like we were co-habitating, but now I want to make it official. I won't do anything brash, but the thought of moving out sounds lovely. I am so mad at her!
Who gives a flying F how hard it was for her 4 years ago. The fact that she never reached out to me, never talked about it, never opened up and trusted me with how difficult it was only makes it worse. But it is done. And now I am struggling. I am tired, hurt, frustrated, disappointed and pissed. And now I am lonely. Because the person who is supposed to be there most is not able to be present. She sucks!